We all have ’em. Emotional Escape Hatches. You know, those little things we do to soften the blow of those little feelings we just don’t want to feel…..

Often clients who start on a healthy living journey (or even those who have been on it for some time) surprise themselves when those little habits they once had – diving into a pint of ice cream, settling into a plate of pastries, eating a bag of M & M’s at the movie theatre – suddenly take over, again, like a body possession of sorts.

I’ve seen this many times, especially when a new batch of 10 or 12 Week Best Shape Challengers start the program. Why does this happen, they wonder, and what’s behind it all?

Well, it’s called being human. We all have our emotional excape hatches. The trick is to know them, name them (call them out, really) so we can start to create something fresh.

See, our patterns of behaviour are like well-worn tire tracks. Our behavious are so well-worn, with year after year of patterned reactions, that the grooves are deep, so deep in fact that they are often unconscious, and our reactions take over: you have a bad day at work, you’re tired and stressed out, your hubby is ignoring you again, your boss reminds you of your controlling father, your sex life is running on empty, your career is stale, your work is unfulfilling….and you over-eat, drink, carouse, fight….

See the problem is that most of us know when we are displaying self-destructive and unhealthy behaviour. We all know that eating  a pint of ice cream probably isn’t the best thing to do…but let’s look deeper, shall we (uh oh…I just know a bunch of you are running for the hills right about now!) Why are you eating that ice cream / souffle / donuts? What feeling / memory / are you trying to dull? Loneliness? Fear? Abandonment? Feeling unloved? Unworthy?

See…if you can learn to NOT fall into those well worn tracks that keep you stuck in the mud, and ask the question in silence…without reacting by reaching for sweets, treats, smoking, alcohol, brawling, an extra marital affair….but how do you do this?

The first thing you do when you reach for that escape item….stop. Sit in silence…be aware, be courageous and ask what sits behind it…what are you trying to not feel? Write it down, cry, breathe, listen, be curious and stand outside yourself, like an observer……

The second thing you do is create a new action…go for a walk, turn on some music and dance, write, do some deep breathing. See nature abhors a vacuum, so you simply can’t NOT do the offending behaviour….you have to replace it with another action. Pretty soon, you will create fresh tire tracks that cut deeper and deeper, and will soon replace the old tire tracks of your destructive behaviour. You will automatically fall into the fresh, new, healthier pattern (tracks) you’ve created. And that soon becomes your default button-a healthier way to soothe and heal your emotional chaos.

We all have our Emotional Escape Hatches. When I was younger, it was drugs and alcohol. But as I ‘matured’, I replaced it with being an over-acheiver and a workaholic. (Yep, I thought I had put my childhood behind me!) But as I continued to dig deeper, I could see the pattern again: while being a ‘workaholic’ seems to be a more approved addiction, it is still an addiction. Hmmm…more work to be done.

Now, when I feel those feelings of anxiety and uncertainty, surely left over from a dysfunctional and chaotic childhood, I turn off the computer and take my dog for a 20 minute walk, breathing in the air, looking up at the sky, and finding things to be thankful for….

There. My anxiety starts to pass, and I feel filled up with power and gratitude, ready to take on the rest of the day. A new set of tire tracks has been created, but it took a very long time to create it (and longer to recognize the hidden feelings under it all) but now it’s my new default. And somehow life seems easier.

Come to know your Emotional Escape Hatches. Be gentle with them…they were created (by you!) to protect you, and you are able to handle them in all their scariness. Emotions can’t hurt you, they just need to be validated, and in doing so, they don’t get bigger (this is what most people fear), they actually diminish and their hold over you starts to dissolve. Ah….freedom at last!

Ladies, be brave. Dig. Open. Look. Feel. And feel it blow right through you…and away from you, into the cosmos. We are the strongest force in the Universe, us women. And we can do this! You CAN do this. I promise. 

Good luck. And happy trails.
karen 

With the start of a New Year, we all have dreams of getting in awesome shape….we start with good intentions, then things fall by the wayside and we go right back to the familiar again…

Why do we do this? Well, life starts to encroach again, we recognize we actually have to carve out time – every day – for our fitness goals. And honestly, fitness take time! And we have to move stuff around and let some things go in order to make it work.

Well, that’s life. If it were that easy – if we didn’t have to give up time, certain foods, our beliefs – then we’d all be fit non-stop! But what I know is that the older you get, the faster time marches on, and along with that, the results of this – a not-so-tight physique and a lack of energy, focus, and, well, a lack of pizazz!

That’s why I created my 10-Week online Best Shape Challenge, which is now in its fifth year. This way, all women need is a computer and a gym to train in, and the rest takes care of itself. Easy, very affordable (3 different workouts and weekly food and lifestyle lessons to get you up and running the real way, without gimmicks, crazy diets, or marketing hype). Considering that a Personal trainer costs $35-$70 an hour, it’s an amazing deal for even the most cost-conscious woman, and I’m there every step. But the onus is on you to do the work.

Last fall a bunch of us went to the Sandra Wickham show and I’ve included a few photos of some before and afters of several hard-working ladies who competed. Now, I know most of you won’t be looking to compete, but that’s not the point – these women are all over 40, came from meager fitness backgrounds and had to come a very long way. And they did. And what and how I teach is not that far removed from competitive-style eating and training (clean, real, no drugs or fat burners), because the woman who makes great gains simply must follow along this continuum, a teaching method I’ve used for 30 years with all my women because it works! I just don’t label it as such because when you say ‘competitive style’…well…all sorts of myths and misconceptions abound!.

We start the 10-Week Best Shape of Your Life Challenge in 5 days! I’ve got 3 spots left. Why not join us? I promise you, if you do as I say, and you follow the program, you will see amazing results. And it’s real training and eating, as a lifestyle that we can learn and embrace for life!

Join us! We kick off this Friday!

karen

Well, I did it again….

I didn’t mean to do it, really. I just happened to hold a sold-out seminar at my house in the summer called How to Eat, Live, Train and Think like a Competitor. Seems they were all interested in how Competitors live and prepare for stage.

Since I went back into competition last year, I’ve kept video journals of the process and I regularly share it with my female clients. For me, it’s always about sharing our experiences with each other: our highs and lows, our triumphs and our pitfalls, the interesting and the mundane, in an effort to share with each other. Because what I’ve learned in my 30+ years of teaching health and wellness is that no woman is an island: women need (and want) a community, a support network of like-minded women to share and learn from.

After I shared my philosophy of how to properly train and eat for show – how I did it 25 years ago and how I still do it today – clean, no drugs, no diuretics or fat burners, applying hard training, gentle cardio, organic foods, no artificials and quality sports supplements (and a healthy amount of calories!) – well, someone asked the inevitable: “why don’t you coach us in competition?”

Uh oh….I just opened another door. “I’ll think about it,” I said.

Then Jane Henson approached me, a dear, long time friend who quietly asked if I would coach her into her first show. “I’ve searched around, interviewed other coaches, and honestly, I don’t want anyone else as a coach except you. And I want to do it your way.”

I thought for a minute, then said, “Alright, let’s do it!” And we went to work.

That was 5 months ago, and what a ride! Just two weeks ago, me and a bunch of ladies all headed over to the Vancouver show to watch and cheer Jane on. And when Jane stood on that stage, she just oozed energy, health and confidence! And she was feeling really, really good! She was truly a Warrior Woman that day, and we were all so proud of her! 

What’s next? Well, I’m heading back into show again next summer, so I’m busy training for that. And it looks like I’ll be coaching 3 lovely ladies along the way, ladies who have been with me for some time and whom all want to compete the Warrior Woman way, the healthy way. And it will be my sheer pleasure to do so. Thank you Sherry, Francesca and Lynn for walking the walk with me. We’re gonna have a fabulous time! (Guess you can’t back out now, eh?)

Coach Karen

PS Still looking for a Christmas idea? Why not give someone an 8-Week full-on training, eating and lifestyle program the Warrior Woman Way, with health, vitality and wellness in mind. My 8-Week BLISS Body Makeover Program, included in my One Rep at a Time fitness book is perfect! And it’s FREE with purchase of my book! Videos, workout cards, eating plans, tips and tidbits, and of course, email support from me! Available at Amazon and at Tanners Books in Sidney and Russell’s Books in Victoria.

I love a good feast, don’t you?

So every month, we have a Clean Eating Gathering where us local gals meet for some yummy, healthy food, and chat and chill out!

Sometimes the group is big, sometimes small. With clients all over North America and some far-away countries..well, the drive is a little far (here’s hoping they’ll start their own satellite of the Clean Eating Gatherings in their neck of the woods!), but I’ve got a pretty strong group of local gals, so we try to meet monthly.

Last night’s Gathering was in beautiful Sooke, along the rugged coast of BC…wow, what a treat! And while I’m always amazed at the food that gets served up (ah, someone has taught these women the principles of clean eating rather well, I may say!), what impresses me more are the women themselves.

See, as a coach and purveyor of physiques, I can’t help myself but notice a nice physique…and well…I’ve known these gals for quite some time, some of them for years, really. And I’m always amazed at the subtle shifts in their bodies over time….

They shift here, tighten up there, remold, re-shape. In general, there are more healthy shapes and curves to the body now, in oh-so-many-places, changes that say ‘I’ve worked hard for this, and I love how I’m feeling’. And it shows in how they walk, sit, dress….I feel so proud and happy for them!

And of course we chat about the not-so-great-stuff too…how we’ve all fallen off at times, how our eating has gotten away from us, how we have lost our time at the gym, or how other commitments seem to seep in and take over our oh-so-busy lives..oh boy!

We talk about struggles with family and friends who don’t understand the journey, or how our mothers (we LOVE you!) may not always understand our focus on fitness because they are from a different generation. And we marvel at how each successive generation has shaped our views of the female form, and boy, are we glad to be a part of this generation, where women are finally daring to change the status quo, to say what they feel and to not settle. And the numbers of women wanting to have – yes, say it – a sexy, curvy, healthy body at any age! – is taking over! Yay! Finally!

Change takes time and dedication, and the courage to believe in yourself and the desire to shed limiting beliefs about what we deserve and what we are capable of.  

Thanks for letting me into your lives, ladies. You remind me of just how strong the female spirit truly is. Now, pass the smoked salmon, will ya?

karen
PS – Sign up for my 10-Week Challenge for January, 2014 has begun! Get your spot TODAY! Only 20 spots!

As part of my Best Shape Challenges, each participant gets a free one-on-one coaching call with me. And I must say, this is one of my favourite parts of the Challenges.

Here, I get to listen and help them over any sticking points, or answer any questions they may have. I’m always amazed at the rainbow of women I chat with.

Like one gal who spends half her time traveling between a tiny gulf island and the eastern arctic city of Iqaluit in Nunavut. Despite her unusual schedule, she is dedicated to working around it, despite having to train late at night when everyone else is asleep, and working the threat of bears (a ‘Bear Alert’ has kept her in her home on more than one occasion!)

Then there is another woman who got the call to duty – she was accepted into the Canadian Forces and is soon traveling to Quebec and Halifax for 5 months training, then onto her new life. She’s taking the Challenge with her, of course, and continuing the work! (No doubt it was that sense loyalty and commitment that got her into the forces in the first place!)

As usual, I have a few shift workers (tough go, you shift workers, but we always make it work), and several teachers whose day starts at 5 am when they make their way to the gym to train before work, the only available free time they have in their busy schedules.

And of course, there are the women struggling through health issues, whose strength and fortitude always amaze me. I was one of those women once, and I know the tough struggle they face every day. But their resolve is palatable and my hat’s off to each and every one of you. We do what we can do, and continue to build health in our own ways.

So when I hear an outsider say, ‘Well, I’d like to try the Challenge but I’ve got this-or-that coming up,’ I know she hasn’t made the switch yet, the one that that says that there is no perfect time to start a program.  The time is now, right now, because unfortunately, life never opens up a 10 week spread of blissful nothingness to allow you to train unencumbered. Not for us anyway. And these 30+ women on my Challenges are all living proof of it.

Through every Challenge, I am reminded of the strength of the female spirit in action. And once again, I am in awe of it all.

Thank you ladies for your generous time and belief in me, the program and yourselves. Onward into the next 5 weeks of self-discovery!

karen

PS My next sign up for the 10-Week Challenge and the 12-Week Advanced Challenge has started! We start January 7th! Get your spot TODAY! (Please note: prerequisite to the Advanced Challenge is for those who have completed the 10-Week Challenge or permission from Karen).

Any decent trainer knows that the easy part of their job is teaching fitness….the hard part is keeping clients motivated and on track after the gym session is over.

That’s why I moved away from the traditional gym model…it’s great to teach someone an hour-long session, but then they go out the door and for the next few days (or weeks, depending on when the next training session is), they are out there on their own! And that’s when they fumble…. and boy can they fumble!

That’s why I created my own training program / model, so I could offer cost effective, flexible training, eating and lifestyle programs to women everywhere, and I could build in as much support as humanly possible! And that’s what I’ve done!

That’s what makes this Internet medium unique….I can use Skype, tele coaching calls, email, Facebook, videos, e-seminars…anything and everything. Love or hate the Internet if you will, but for fitness and nutrition, it is a gold mine, if you know how to use it and you use everything at your disposal.

No matter what the program – my 10 Week Challenge, 12-Week Advanced Challenge, the Monthly Healthy Living Program, or my Ft n Fab Competitors Program, I am always there for my women. Use me, I always say to them. I am here to serve YOU! (And I don’t just say that to anyone!)

But every once in awhile we need human contact, yes? So we started our monthly Clean Eating Gatherings, where a different gal hosts the evening…. It’s a chance to meet other women on the path, eat some amazing food, hang out and share stories, recipes….. and a few laughs! (Yep, last night at our Victoria Gathering we had to share the space with King Tut! You just never know who will show up! Fun).

Whatever program you’re on, or whoever your coach is, make sure you feel supported along the way, every minute of the day. In this day and age, there is simply no excuse for you NOT to be supported!

You deserve it!

karen

PS Don’t forget to join my McCoy Fitness Facebook…daily tips to keep you on track and enlightened!

My 10-Week Challenge kicked off two weeks ago with a full house! I simply love teaching these programs.

I love seeing who shows up. Like one client who is taking her Challenge on the road with her…all the way to Iqaluit (Nunavut)! Despite the many obvious obstacles, she is doing it! (The only hiccup was when she had to temporarily stop going outdoors because a bear threat!). 

And then there’s another gal who is on a cruise for 2 weeks during the Challenge…”That’s when I’ll need it the most, with all the lovely buffets around.”

And there are others with health issues, injury, and crazy work schedules. Some have so little time they don’t know how they will fit it in….but they do! And they are!

To these women, I say thank you! You are a living, breathing example of the female spirit in action, the one that says “I’m worth it, and life is crazy but somehow I’ll make it work.”

Life stops for no one. So when someone emails me and says she’d like to do the Challenge but she’s away for a week during the Challenge, or her life isn’t in order right now, I know she  hasn’t made the switch inside. Life will never carve out 10 easy weeks for you. That’s the point, really….. Powerful women go with the flow. No excuses. And if they falter…well, we all do. That too is part of life.

Thank you to all the amazing ladies that showed up for our September Challenges. You inspire me every single day, when I hear your stories and share your struggles, but you keep on keepin’ on.

I raise my dumbell to you!
Karen

My next 10-Week Challenge starts January!. Reserve your spot! It fills fast!

PS Ladies, don’t forget your order for your next EDGE Protein drop off. Order week this week! As usual, discounted for YOU! For Sidney and Victoria residents. For more info, please see my other web site: www.edgeprotein.com

Yesterday I had lunch with a dear friend and colleague…we chatted about work, training, friendship, children, marriage, divorce, and everything in between. She’s had a tough go of it lately, this friend of mine, but her zest for life is palatable. Her positive outlook is undeniable. And there is a knowingness in her that she will be taken care of, and all is well, even if it doesn’t look like it in this moment.

I spied her fridge, with its collection of inspiring quotes, healthy food charts, pics of women in training, and other such items meant to inspire and motivate.

I loved it. It’s how me, and those around me, have learned to live – by accepting what we have (even when the going gets tough) and learnign to attract what we need, what feeds up. And we are always reaching, believing, and knowing something better is always coming down the pipe, if you just stay open to it all.

Time and time again I am reminded of just how strong the female spirit truly is. And I know that there is strength in numbers, that we are not alone, and that as a group, us women can do more, be more, accomplish more.

So I asked this woman to work for me! Fun!

Many people view what I do as merely teaching fitness and nutrition, but my clients know it is so much more than that. Fitness is my platform that allows me to delve deeper into other parts of myself, and I know this is true for a lot of women. When we learn to apply a healthy eating and a consistent exercise  routine to our lives, we become empowered, stronger, more real. And more accepting of life’s ups and downs.

So wherever you are in your life, say what you want, what you desire, where you are working towards, and stay focused. It’s out there, I promise. You simply need to call it in.

Or plaster pictures up on your fridge! Works for me! And for her too, it seems!

Love you B!

karen

PS Only 6 days left to sign up for my popular 10-Week Best Shape of YOUR Life Challenge. YOU deserve it! Join us! I’m with you every step of the way! Promise! 3 spots left! Kick off is Sept 9th, registration closes Sept 4th!

The Universe has spoken…and I am listening.

I’ve been envisioning building a retreat and studio for many years. About 15 years to be exact. It began when my world blew apart: my son’s diagnosis coupled with severe health issues and childhood trauma that just wouldn’t go away…the perfect storm for a drastic change.

I’d like to say it was a fast turn-around, but it wasn’t. As chronicled in my popular book One Rep at a Time, I was in that dark place for many years. Fear, sadness, guilt, confusion, depression and pain were my constant companions.

Two years of intensive therapy coupled with a long and exhaustive journey into the spiritual and metaphysical realm brought me out the other end. Alive. Healthy. Energized. With fresh tools…

I’ve been using many of these tools in my on-line training and nutrition programs for years. I can’t help teaching what I know, because what I know for sure is that us women are in this together. We are all challenged. We all lose faith. We all need a little more….

I’ve spent the last 6 years building McCoy Fitness and what a great ride it’s been. But this summer (like all summers), I took pause…… I looked around. I took stock. That uncomfortable feeling was seeping back in again…

Uh oh. That only means change is a-coming…

So, I am planning my Warrior Woman Retreat and Fitness Studio to be built on my amazing piece of property north of Victoria. And I’m using all my senses and calling on my ‘spiritual team’ to help me. Because I know this feeling, and I know this is what I’m meant to do. How will it come about? Where will the funds come from? That is not for me to ask. My role is to envision and get the energy in motion…break ground. Draw out the blueprints. The Universe, Providence, Divine Guidance…whatever you want to call it, has opened a portal in my mind’s eye. And my role is to step into it and bring it into fruition. That’s all I know for sure.

We all have a purpose in life, and mine is to teach. Not scholastic in nature. But to teach what I know, to connect other women, to support and inspire, and to provide a space of security and openness where it can be done. In all my programs, I have tried to provide this to all my clients, and I think I’ve been successful. But now I need a bricks and mortar place to extend those teachings…workshops, meditation retreats, training and clean eating according to Mother Nature, and in her own back yard. Putting competitors thru the rigors in a place that teaches and builds health and vitality at every step. That’s what women need and deserve. I am merely a vessel, and my new Warrior Woman Retreat and Fitness Studio will be the physical meeting place for all things to occur. I can hardly wait.

I’ve been on this metaphysical path for 20 years. Once born a ‘meat and potatoes’ gal, the what-you-see-is-what-you-get variety (ho hum…), I now know there are other worlds out there, other avenues most women ‘feel’, but don’t know how to access. Or they are afraid to access it. But we need all planes – physical and astral – to move into our greatest and grandest version of ourselves….you with me?

My physical training and nutrition business will continue…it’s my calling, and I love it. It is who I am. But now, it will just include a spiritual and energetic bend to it, the way I envisioned it almost 20 years ago. It’s what women need. It’s what they crave. And I can offer it to them at my new Retreat Center.

To open spring, 2014.

Karen – PS Grab a spot in my September 10-Week Best Shape of your Life Challenge…only 20 spots! Join us!